u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
