Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Randomize
