the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
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