is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
