The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
