dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
