Fuck appropriateness.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize
