You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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