yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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