I'm lost and stupid without you.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
