I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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