I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
