So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
