these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
he fucked my hip out of place.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
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