I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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