i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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