As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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