Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
