somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
im about as happy as oj after his trial
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize