i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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