carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I should be sponsored by Trojan
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
