Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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