So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Sorry my hands just texted you
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
