please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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