You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Randomize
