i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
