Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
