I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
