idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
