help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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