i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize