We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
He better not be in your backpack
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
