so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
She told me I should be a condom model.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
