He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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