I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Your dad touched me again.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
