A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize