that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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