THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
