There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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