Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Randomize