Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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