I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
