Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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