So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
