Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
