i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
