In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
well you can't waste a boner
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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