She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
