I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Hippo gnu deer
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
