Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
