Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
