We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
